Dementia, Mum and Me

The past few posts have been negative and angry. We are now somewhere totally new. This is a good thing for all concerned. Mum is happy and comfortable. I am happy.  I'm living my life as well as making sure she has her basic needs met, gets to Cogs club and sees her friends. Win/Win. Me trying too hard is why I ended up crumbling to the point of needing lots of love, care and medical attention. I should have just been me. Accepting that this has to be enough as this is all I can give. Now, here we are with me off to hospital and having treatment. Mum didn't seem to happy about having to get a cab to her cogs club but I'm unable to drive for a couple of days due to the anaesthetic.  That's just bad luck. Accepting that mum will always demand her own needs first, putting mine second has made me feel differently about things. Don't get me wrong, if she was in hospital of course I would drop everything and be there. I should have allowed her to get on with d...

What a difference a comment can make. Ok, so Dad always referred to me as 'sensitive' in a negative manner. Yes, perhaps those comments helped me to become sensitive in the first place, with so much criticism being thrown at me growing up. Then paranoia can creep in. "You always take things to heart." I was told. Actually, this can be a good thing. Being passionate. I have raised my two children to embrace who they are, however other people look at things. That said, a simple comment from an onlooker can definitely change how you feel. Over on my other dementia blog, which I definitely can't seem to get back now, I wrote a post about someone telling mum she doesn't have dementia! Remember that one?  I was furious! Well, the past few days have seen some similar emotions come bubbling to the surface. Off to Turkey Smiling despite being confused Gatwick airport is fantastic for Special Assistance and I have created a Youtube video all abou...

I was keen to see what the cardiology people would say at mums appointment.   My previous blog outlined her Mobitz2 symptoms and her diastolic disfunction .  Now just recently, as I use the pulse oximeter to take mums obs I can see her oxygen levels average around 91-93%.  We ideally want to see 99%.  This reads the oxygen in the blood which is being carried around the body to the organs.  Likely to be causing damage at these levels, I do like to see what is going on. It also gives a pulse/heartbeat pattern which is fascinating to watch. Mum flatlines on every 3rd-6th beat.  Then it bangs one big old pump and has two mini pumps then the few normal ones again.  Much as I'm aware this isn't right, I wasn't totally sure what this might be telling us. Back last year, after her heart attack, she had a device fitted .  Clicking that link shows you all about it.  It doesn't do anything to the heart except read it.  Clever right. ...